A dear friend once shared, “never lie to yourself” , the statement revealed his camouflage. Been hurt with the truth before. Did I see the signs and ignore them? Maybe. But love does that right?
“Brenda this is your gift, your “catalytic”, it’s an odd gift, no one pray’s for this one, and yet, it suites you perfectly, Our Creators gift to you” A visiting prophet stoically expressed his vision.
“What do you mean?” was my response. He paused, smiled, paused again and with a sigh said;
“Brenda whatever is hidden within the recess of their soul, will be revealed, it may not always be light, just know you are divinely protected and they have been guided to you, for a teaching and the lesson”. There was a longer pause now as I was attempting to digest what this prophet was sharing. He consummated with this;
“Many will be led to you as they search to see who they are” *pause* “They will think it is for self esteem, when in actuality it is to face the truth seeded deep within them”.
The session concluded with; “You my child are called to be an agent of change”
First I was elated hearing this, felt a literal invisible cloak being placed on my shoulders, it was very heavy. Felt “chosen” felt “special”. It wasn’t until years later, understood, people really don’t like change, and to fall in love with a “a client of the Creator’s”? TOTALLY unacceptable. Doing so, caused me great pain.
Maybe I was being called to a life of celibacy? Though this thought was definitely alien.
One must not deny their own authenticity, also we must not create graven images. By doing so we can unconsciously disown our passion and siphon off our gift for catalytic change! It was time to reflect within the confines of still calm waters, drink in this doxology of gratitude.
Being poor in self confidence and creative energy keeps us in lack much more than a lean purse.” Sarah Ban Breathnach
While seeking balance, was called a gypsy. Someone I am fond of, actually grabbed my shoulders, looked intently at me and soberly called me this. At first I thought he was joking. Ok so even if it was under the moonlight, and even if he also said I looked like Miley Cyrus, the gypsy comment totally caught me off guard. Of course I asked him to elaborate and his thoughts made me gravely sad. He had no idea where he was sending me, launching me into my past as he was distinctly asking me why I had no roots, why I didn’t own a home, didn’t own land. I was speechless.
Divorce has a way of leaving you nakedly exposed. You gather what is left of your heart and reinvent yourself. Knowing Radical Forgiveness is the only way, you journey on, at first mournfully within the dark night, a traveler without balance and our true nature unveils.
An unresolved issue will be like a cancer with the potential to spread into other areas of your relationship, eroding the joy, lightness, love and beauty. –Joyce Vissell
Lately only feel grounded with my camera in hand, tromping through the wetlands, or mountaintops and valley, watching the birthing sun, yes wherever no walls surround me.
Suppose I need electricity, wifi, so to upload images and see the miraculous, other then that believe the rest can just go to hell, even my hair. Oh it’s wild and unkempt and so me.
Our eyes give us away don’t they?
Our focus is where our heart is feeding. Sometimes desire complicates the assignment. Sometimes the need to be understood is greater than the need to understand.
And whatever is needed can be found. Hungry? Sad? Lonely? JOY? Yes, all answers are located just between your heartbeat. One must be still enough to hear, a practiced art of the Irish Travelers they say. It’s much deeper then listening. For when you hear, you transform, yes you change negative behaviour.
I am told it happens within an atmosphere of love, a humble heart wired to serve. And to find someone with the same faith, same hope to agree with you? Dream with you?
Ahh to find that my friends is a driving force indeed!
For now, will be content uploading the refreshing as Nature exposes herself to me
And listen to dreams from Grandfather, knowing though I have no material ownership, roots indeed run deep. It’s time, to love on, shake off greed, avarice and lust. Embrace all of Our Creators gifts to us with matrimony being the utmost, His gift, choice, yes the covenant of Hope.
For if we fail to choose love, what and who will feed our offspring?! We must shed apathy and take up our staff face our fears, and lovingly conquer.