Our daughter called, my lil passion flower; “Mom let me take you to our favorite Nursery” and there she graciously showed me their lil haven, where they learned the secrets on how to create a thriving garden. We entered into a screened area; reminded me a bit of Butterfly World, so breathtaking and larvae EVERYWHERE, learned about milk weeds and passion flowers and my very first vine was purchased. Joyfully chose seeds and pretty potted flowers… thinking “If I was a butterfly …. “ with delight the soil was tilled and the bees, butterfly’s and critters came!
It’s so peaceful watching nature show up while watering. During one of these encounters spied this dangling brown thing. The day earlier a caterpillar so thoughts of having our very own personal pupae enthralled me!
Posted it on my Face Book Wall and thought well I had at least 14 days before it hatched as it was newly discovered. This is when I was educated “14 days? That butterfly is coming out in the next 24 hours!” Well kept a dedicated vigil and the next morning saw the lil thing was indented and thought maybe a lizard bit it.
Again educated with the most dreadful news; “Brenda I am so sorry but everyone in the group agrees that its already dead. There is some debate on whether or not you should put it in the freezer which will kill OE spores” WTH? OE SPORES!!! I was freaking. Recently enthralled learning about the male vs female butterfly, male have the black spots, the visitor below in my garden was female.
and NOW THIS! A disease called Ophryocystis elektroscirrha, has been affecting Monarchs since 1960, this spore disease discovered in Florida of all places. A protozoan parasite that has infected every Monarch population to date including North America, Australia, Cuba, Central and South America and Hawaii!!
The education of this brought me to tears! Why? 1. I was viewing this discovery symbolically NEW BIRTH relating to my personal life. 2. This infection maligns normal growth, disfigures and kills. There would be no new birth now. With tears I laid this dead lil pupae to rest. My FB family encouraged me saying; “I’m so sorry. I was really excited for you. Plant some milkweed if you haven’t already and I promise you will have more next year!”
Today while watering, viewed little visitors however still felt pang in my heart for the one who never emerged. Thinking about spore infection in nature and in man. Thoughts take root and give birth to actions. And this protozoan invasion is so unfair, little guy didn’t have a chance. He ate, digested and even had energy to make his chrysalis yet was wrapped up with this dark intruder and was consumed to death. There was nothing I could do to help, except mourn for what could have been.
“An unresolved issue will be like a cancer with the potential to spread into other areas of your relationship, eroding the joy, lightness, love and beauty”–Joyce Vissell
Father, oh Creator of our souls, Oh Holy One who graces mercy towards the fallen. Clinging, as tears slice flesh, knowing you love deeper, release “needing to know why” so to trust you with the unseen, knowing you’ve got this……..every one of us, submitted to Your Holy Will, now and forever more..of YOU…………amen.
Addendum:YOU CAN NOT MAKE THIS STUFF UP …CAME OUTSIDE AFTER WRITING THIS BLOG .. after writing this prayer. Listening to Adele’s new song HELLO go to put my feet up talking to my roommate AND I SEE THIS YES I AM CRYING A POP OF GREEN can you find the new Chrysalis?