Ok it’s time…why am I hesitating? Oh No..not AGAIN!

homeWell it’s happened again. “Can you paint this for me?” It’s so much easier to take a picture and it’s sad maybe this is my problem? JUDGEMENT and FEAR  Say if they don’t like it? –

I am so not a lazy person, so love to compete with myself, set private goals, stretch my perceptions yet when it comes to this, Producing for another…I freeze.

Just the other day a co-worker was looking at my photos and commenting; “These are remarkable” and she asked why I haven’t entered them in a competition. My response was immediate; “If you saw the photos of the ones who taught me you would know these are not at that level”.  My own words resonated within me.

As a kid never thought twice. If I loved it, poured myself into the project, into the hunt, into whatever it was with wild abandonment. Whatever or however led, would just “do it”, and not give up until it was mastered. Now that I think back on it, whatever my eyes were set on, my heart on, eventually was attained.

Who taught me to compromise who I AM?!!

If we have a talent it’s not really “mine”, rather it’s “ours”. Each one of us has gifts and when freely given MIRACLES HAPPEN! Nevertheless if one is full of bitterness, full of judgment, strife, anger, fear….one literally can’t give. So what caused you to fear?

Now I have to ask; what excuses have I made for choosing not to believe? Not to trust in Gods Grace to complete “me“, no matter how I feel…NOW is the time to step on fear’s ugly head and trust the One who Created me to be...just this…living Faith, living Hope..living Love. Amen

My son put my chair together today, the one that helps me sit at my easel. Yup, no more excuses. WOW ok now I am tearing up Lord YES, Lord..set the captives free…let it first start with me


One life is all we have and we live it as we believe in living it. But to sacrifice what you are and to live without belief, that is a fate more terrible than dying.
Joan of Arc

About Brenda

"Brenda adores the birds. She is enchanted with their grace, their beauty. It was the birds and being out among them that gave her the peace she so needed and forged a new passion She uses a camera to capture those incredible moments, to savor them and share them with others. For her the camera was freedom. Brenda spent her life healing others, and dealing with incredible pain and despair. The world of birds and nature and photography was what she turned to in order to see the beautiful side of the world" -Eric Curtis Cummings
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7 Responses to Ok it’s time…why am I hesitating? Oh No..not AGAIN!

  1. Brenda says:

    Guys when i started writing this OMGosh i deleted so much…woah…guess more layers coming off..and then i read this : Mike Dooley
    Of course it’s hard at first. You’re going where you’ve never gone.

    And i guess…i trust you guys…my GBE family…and put on a password protect…re read this and think why am i fearing to go public??? LOL its true..living authentically is RADICAL ok think i am ready to take off the password protect..LOL

  2. Jo Heroux says:

    You are safe here. The future is yours, my friend. Go make it what makes you happy. Painting seems like something you would love and your photography is amazing. Stop comparing and start appreciating your own talent and your own eye. You are loved, appreciated and such a good soul. Be whoever you are and be THAT as big as possible.

  3. Langley says:

    Are you kidding me? If I had your talent, sister, I’d be strutting around like a peacock! I completely agree with this: If we have a talent it’s not really “mine”, rather it’s “ours”, so get out there and share your creativity. Even if you just paint for a few eyes, please let mine be one of them. I can’t wait to see your next creation, Brenda.

  4. Anna says:

    I love it! You and your pictures are AWESOME! We are always our own worst critics but be confident that God gave you your specific talents that make you YOU!

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