Recently was asked the rhetorical question; “What would you do different in High School?” and now this week “If I had my Life to live over..” and who comes to mind; Peggy Paternoster. She once shared; “Brenda you always see the positive in everyone”. Funny, hadn’t seen that side of me but do remember, wouldn’t tolerate anyone making fun of people.
Recall boys spitting at one of my classmates from the bus yelling; “Tiny Tim”. Disgusted me, their meanness. If it was me who had to walk to school, probably find another route or beg my parents to drive me every day, because every day these bastard boys would do this. I stood, turned and yelled; “Stop it, say if i spit on you everyday, she is my friend, just stop it”. Hadn’t planned it and maybe was a little violent in my pleading because a hush went through the noisy bus which seemed like eternity. My body violently shook. The next day one of the guys spoke another degrading comment, when he saw her walking but with an addition; “We better not say anything or Warner will wig out on us”. My heart was beating fast, feared them but my righteousness was bigger.
Would have I done it differently? Heck why go there?! What difference will it make right now? The past is the past, yet my conscious brought Peggy to mind and with this, pure gratitude rushes in and the question; what makes anyone change?
The spirit of man is entombed. Like Lazarus, whose voice will encourage you to rise and let the mummy cloth unravel? Nevertheless, even if you do resurrect from a past life, is this fomented change months away from collapsing back to “once was”? The key is to pinpoint where knowing let doubt in, shadowing your joy.
Yup this is where I want to live, seeing the best in everyone, cast off the negative and love life despite the petty terrorism within. After all, even clouds can be beautiful, precipitation cleanses and aspersion just may stimulate ressurectional change. This type of transformation casts healing light. Reflections of “i wish i was when i wished i was what i am now” is never again and miracles a daily happenstance!